Thank you so much for taking time to reply to my questions.
Yesterday my son made the comment that he was worried about me being out here in the country by myself. I asked him if he thought I needed a babysitter.
When I told my daughter later last evening she said "Does he have a clue who he is dealing with? You are one of the strongest women I know. You will probably sell the house, buy a motor home and we will never see you." She may be my stepdaughter but she knows me so well after 30 years.
Today when the nurse came she told me we have a few days and at best a week. I am coming to terms with this even though I still don't want it to happen, but now when I sit here and see him reaching for things or those loved ones who have gone before I actually find peace in the fact that he will not be suffering anymore. I think being home with him this past week and essentially his only full time caregiver has made it easier for me to let go. It is not that he has been difficult to take care of, because he has not, but I do not want to see him suffer any more than he has too. The kids are having a hard time right now which only makes me determined to be strong for them and I know I can hold it together, but I also know when all is said and done I will fall apart in private with Duncan for comfort. That is just me.